Learned the hard way

Just a quick post slash parenting tip. If you’ve tried to set up a bedtime for your child, stick to it. Case(s) in point: a couple weeks ago, after purchasing the book “660 Curries”, I decided that I had to have a spice grinder for the masalas that I would make. I took Sam with me to Bed, Bath, and Beyond to get those last few wiggles out before his bedtime, which at the time had been happening anywhere between 8 and 9. I left around 7:45…and I’m sure you can see where I’m going with this.

He cried the entire way to the store, which I should have taken as a sign to turn around and mope back home with my tail between my legs. I say “should” because I of course did not follow my instinct which was screaming at my pride for being so arrogant. Oh no, I didn’t turn around and go home. I took Sam out of his car seat, placed him in a baby carrier and went and bought the spice grinder I couldn’t live without. He was entertained in the store by all the neat things along the walls and he didn’t cry at all. That is, until I got back to the car and put him in his car seat. By this time he was beyond tired and overwhelmed from the day’s events. On top of that I accidentally bonked his head on the frame of the door getting him back into the car seat. Needless to say he screamed the entire way home and I mean screamed. This was an all out, no holds barred, blood-curdling wail that could only be cured by breast milk, a swaddle blanket, and a rocking chair.

Which leads me to tonight. As I write this entry, I sit on the couch with a much desired beer next to me. Sam is asleep in his crib after yet another very rough journey to bed. I agreed to go to Amelia’s quintet rehearsal with Sam so that everyone could see him again and marvel at his cuteness. We left at 7:30 and right before we left I had a sneaking suspicion that I was going to be in for a rough time. And I was absolutely right. He screamed on the way to rehearsal, played happily for the 30 minutes we were at rehearsal, and then screamed even louder all the way home. Luckily I was able to calm him down tonight with a swaddle and some expert swaying and shushing. He was down for the count within minutes.

Sam has clearly come to expect a certain series of events that end with him going to bed to start around 7:30 but no later than 8. Tonight I interrupted that when I agreed to take him to the quintet rehearsal and he and I both suffered because of it. This is one of the many challenges of parenting, truly putting your child before yourself. Of course I want people to be able to see him. I’m so proud of this baby and so in love with who he is that I can’t stand to think of depriving anyone the time to be around him. And all the comments that people make about how cute he is or how he looks or acts like me or Amelia, well that’s just validation that I’ve done a good job and that he indeed is just as cute as I think he is. And I need that validation sometimes. Being a parent is a lot of hard work and when you don’t get that encouragement along the way it is easy to get self-conscious and self-critical.

But in the end that desire for validation and the hope that everyone can see just how great of a baby he is came at a cost for him. Sam needed me to stay home with him and do the bedtime routine so that he could calmly fall sound asleep and rest in order to be able to greet tomorrow with a happy mood and an oh-so cute smile. Tonight I learned the hard way that giving up your self is one of the best gifts you can give to your child and I hope that I remember this lesson for years to come.

Hippie Cookies

Amelia came up with this recipe a year or so ago and I made them for my coworkers at KU. I like to call them hippie cookies because they’re super healthy. At their core they are peanut butter, banana, oatmeal, chocolate chip cookies. Because of the peanut butter and the bananas they don’t require butter or eggs and I add flax seeds to give them even more of a heart healthy boost. Depending on how long you bake them they’ll have a soft, chewy texture or a crunchy outside and soft middle texture. Either way they taste great and provide a healthier alternative to your average chocolate chip cookie. Here’s the recipe if you want to make them yourself.

Software:

• 2 very ripe (or over-ripe) bananas
• ¼ c. Peanut Butter (I use chunky)
• 2tbsp. Soy Milk (cow’s milk would work as well)
• 2tbsp. Pure Maple Syrup
• 1 tsp. vanilla
• 2 ½ c. Rolled Oats (also called “Old-fashion” oats)
• Cinnamon (to taste)
• Chocolate Chips (to taste)
• Flax Seeds (to taste, optional)

Hardware:

• Large Mixing Bowl
• Masher
• Spoon for mixing
• Two spoons for transferring batter to baking sheets
• 2 Baking Sheets
• Parchment Paper or Wax Paper

1. Preheat oven to 350F.
2. In a large mixing bowl mash the bananas and stir in peanut butter, milk, syrup and vanilla.
3. Add oats, cinnamon, chocolate chips, and flax seeds (if using) and stir well to combine.
4. Line two cookie sheets with parchment or wax paper.
5. Add cookie batter by the spoonful, about 12 per cookie sheet.
6. Bake 13-15 minutes @ 350F. Cookies are done when edges are firm to touch but centers “give” a little.
7. Let cool on the baking sheets.

Notes: These cookies do not flatten as they bake so you will have to shape them while putting the batter on the cookie sheet, much like a no-bake cookie. This is a really flexible recipe which is why there are so many things that are “to taste” and I’m sure you could use any other kind of nut butter as a substitution for the peanut butter. Also, you can make these cookies as small or as large as you like and as long as you flatten them pretty well they’ll still bake in the same amount of time.